The Pitfalls of our mind – Part 2
Mind altering habits which take you nowhere
Continuing from the previous article below are a few more personalities you can relate to.
The Pitfalls of our mind: You can relate the habits with the set of people as we go along.
Blowing out of proportion – Then comes the set of people who are best at “making a mountain of a molehill”, which we call as “Rai ka Pahaad” in Hindi. If they get cut even the slightest bit, they feel and make everyone feel as if they are going to die. You would have heard friends say, “I am sure I will fail in the exam tomorrow” and spend their time in the fear of failure thought, palpitate, cry, and even lock themselves up in a room making the entire atmosphere tense and unhappy. I have seen leaders in great organizations who start a meeting with a sarcastic note and then at the slightest sight of the tiniest error, turn the meeting upside down and ensure that everyone gets a message of being worthless, whereas the work was actually great, and it could have been just a comma missing in the PowerPoint. These people are generally very volatile in their thoughts, and you seldom see them grounded with anything. The best way they can help themselves and all people around them is to be patient and not assume anything till the event is over.
Assumptive – Now let’s meet the “Assumptive”. These people always know from before what others think of them, even when it has not been explicitly stated by the other person. “I am telling you, my boss doesn’t like me. See how she talks to me every day.” Even though her boss might be trying to help and sharing her valuable inputs, the person has already formed an opinion about her even without speaking to her about the matter, which obviously, can’t be changed. Now imagine how bewildered the Boss or any friend or partner or spouse would be that even though they are trying their best to help the person, she is never happy and always in a shield. This generally results in trust issues at both ends and a beautiful relationship can be written off even before starting. The base of this type of behavior, as I have observed, is more to do with people trying to hide their vulnerability and blaming it on someone in a way which does not make them feel responsible. And the only thing which will help them in this is to talk out their heart and get the facts correct.
Know everything beforehand – You would have heard some of your friends say “I am telling you by the time we will reach the restaurant, all tables would be occupied” whereas you haven’t would have even started your car or called the restaurant to book, or even if someone would have spoken with the manager, still these set of people will form their opinion in their heads and keep on imposing it on everyone, till the event happens. The best part is that these set of folks always have the intuition that whatever will happen will only be negative. In this process, the entire atmosphere will be full of anxiety, and you will not enjoy the drive too. You would have seen a lot of movies where the SEALS or SWAT or the ARMY conduct preemptive strikes, and they are good. However, the subtle difference between both the preemptive strikes is that while SEALS, SWAT or ARMY would have gathered data to conclude and action the strike, these set of people live in a world of “No Data and No Patience”. Obviously, the answer for this set is to get factual. Get data points, and please do not impose your anxiety on everyone around you, ensuring perspiration and desperation, even if it is done amicably.
In the next article we shall explore a few more. Stay tuned.
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